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Speaking for myself...I am in a relationship with a guy my mom picked out before she passed in 2009. He has done an 180 since.....I love him but he is so set in his ways.... I am 32 and he is 50...
Before I became self approved I grew up in a community of women that validated themselves by the men they were with. Often times I heard the words "old maid' which is what we were called if we weren't in a relationship when every other female was. This was pressure for me back then (trust and believe I so elevated past that mess) and sooo I hooked up and stayed in relationships with individuals I was never equally yoked with mentally, spiritually, financially, or otherwise. I think often times this is a reason women stay in unhealthy relationships, sometimes it's cause there are kids involved, other times females just wanna be able to say "I got a man". One thing I know for sure (in my Oprah voice) is that until we learn to love ourselves for the magnificent beings we are we as women will continue to down play ourselves and stay in unhealthy, non-profitable relationships.
A lot of women do want validation and the title of being someone's woman. They are willing to have this with anyone as long as it's someone. Loving yourself 1st will make you understand your worth.
My relationship before my husband was with a guy who was not the guy for me, and I knew it. I felt that because everyone else had given up on him I wasn't going to do the same. I wanted to save him, but later I realized you can't save someone who doesn't want to be saved. I let him go and found my husband.